Try this. When you are deciding who will be in your close circle of friends, ask yourself: Is she walkin’ or just talkin’? If her actions match her words, you have a friend worth keeping! Here are some examples:
Scenario
Talkin' the TalkWalkin' the WalkYou have a crush on Luke. Luke asks your best friend to meet him at the movies. She knows that you would be hurt if you thought Luke liked her instead.Your friend tells you that Luke is a loser so you won't like him anymore, and she meets him at the movie in secret.Your friend tells Luke that she is flattered, but she can't go. She suggests that he calls you because she knows you don't have anything planned for FridayThe big party of the year is coming up. Your best bud is invited, but you aren't. One of the girls having the party tells your friend that she thinks you are a nerd and encourages her to come hang with the "popular" kids.Your best bud tells you she has family plans, but she goes to the party anyway.Your friend thanks the hostess for the invitation, but she hangs with you instead. She realizes that if they don't respect you for who you are, then they are not the type of people she wants to hang with anyway.Your friend is walking down the hall and sees you coming out of the bathroom. The hem of your cute skirt is accidentally tucked in your underwear, and your butt is almost showing. She's a long way down the hall.She laughs hysterically, ducks into her next class and tells everyone about it.She runs down the hall and quietly stands behind you, tells you and makes sure you get your skirt right.You tell your best friend two big secrets. One, your parents are separating. Two, you are seeing a therapist to help you with your emotions. It's obvious you are very sensitive about these two issues.Your friend acts all sad for you, but then you find out she told another girl that you are seeing a therapist so you must be "crazy."Your friend offers emotional support and keeps your secrets. She is there for you whenever you need her, and she's a great listener.Introducing
. . . Miss Popularity!Remember Girl Power? It’s the confidence that lets you make choices that are good for you, even if they aren’t the same choices everybody else is making. Well, get ready to use your Girl Power, because the crazy thing is that sometimes the most popular girls are the ones who tear you down and don’t build you up. Go figure!
That kind of popularity is usually based on negative things. Some girls bully their way into being popular by intimidating or threatening people. Maybe they make you wish you had their gorgeous hair, killer clothes or good body. Maybe they flaunt their “sexiness” or put other people down. Lots of people seem almost afraid of this kind of popular girl because they don’t want to be on her “bad side.”
Oh, the glitz . . . the glamour . . . the fame of basking in the glow of the ever-popular, ever-beautiful, ever-manipulative girls! Yuck! The bottom line is that choosing positive, caring, trustworthy friends might mean that you have to distance yourself from a particular popular crowd.
That’s the yuck side of popularity. But “popularity” is not always a word you choke down like a bitter pill. There are marvelous reasons to be popular. They are all reasons about who you are, what your strengths are, what your talents are and things you have in common with other people. All positive things about you!
Popular just means that certain people like you. The soccer goalie is popular with the athletic crowd. The guy who plays Romeo in the school play is popular with the drama crowd. The girl who reads to sick children at the hospital is popular with the community service crowd. Everybody can be popular in her own way!
And remember that being popular is not the same as having a lot of friends. True friends know each other well, not just superficially. Just because a lot of people may know someone or may like her doesn’t necessarily mean they are all her good friends. Consider yourself lucky if you have even one close friend who is the true, heart-to-heart, soul-to-soul, secret-sharing, help-you-through-anything, stand-up-for-you-always kind of friend. Now,
Think about the last five times you got into an argument with a friend. What happened most often? Did you get your feelings hurt by something she said, or did she bust your lip with a vicious punch to the chin? We’re betting your friend’s weapon of choice was her words and not her fist.
Борис Александрович Тураев , Борис Георгиевич Деревенский , Елена Качур , Мария Павловна Згурская , Энтони Холмс
Культурология / Зарубежная образовательная литература, зарубежная прикладная, научно-популярная литература / История / Детская познавательная и развивающая литература / Словари, справочники / Образование и наука / Словари и Энциклопедии