Journey

“I think he's hungry,” Lizzie said with more confidence than her mother felt, and the social worker gave them his bag, his formula, and a list of instructions for him. She handed Maddy a thick envelope with his adoption papers. She still had to go to court one more time, but it was only a formality. The baby was hers. She was keeping his first name, and had decided to change his last name and her own to her maiden name of Beaumont. She didn't want anything more to do with Jack Hunter. Even if she went on another show again, she had decided to do so as Madeleine Beaumont. And he was Andrew William Beaumont now. She had given him his middle name in honor of his godfather. And as they left the social worker's office, she was wearing a look of awe as she carried her precious bundle.

They stopped at a baby shop and the drugstore on the way home, and bought everything Lizzie and the woman in the store told her she needed. It filled the taxi so full there was hardly room for them, and Maddy was beaming when they walked into the apartment, and the phone was ringing.

“I'll hold him for you, Mom,” Lizzie volunteered and Maddy hated to give him up even for a minute. If she had ever wondered if it was the right thing, she knew for certain now that it was, and had been exactly what she needed and wanted.

“Where've you been?” the familiar voice asked. It was Bill, calling from Vermont. He had just come back from an afternoon of ice skating with his grandson. And he couldn't wait to tell her about it. “Where were you, Maddy?” he asked again, and she smiled as she answered.

“Picking up your godson,” she said proudly. Lizzie had just turned the Christmas tree lights on, and the apartment looked cozy and warm, although she was sorry not to be with Bill on Christmas. Especially now that Andy had joined them.

For a moment, he didn't understand what she meant, and then he realized, and smiled. He could hear in her voice how happy she was. “That's a pretty major Christmas present. How is he?” He could hear how she was.

“He's so beautiful, Bill.” And then she glanced at Lizzie and smiled at her as she held her new brother.

“Not as pretty as Lizzie was, but he's pretty cute. Wait till you see him.”

“Are you bringing him to Vermont?” But he knew it was a silly question as soon as he said it. She had no other alternative, and he wasn't a newborn. He was a healthy two-and-a-half-month-old. He would be ten weeks old on Christmas morning.

“If it's all right with you, I'd love to.”

“Bring him along. The kids will love him. And I guess he and I better get acquainted if I'm going to be his godfather.” He didn't say more to her, but he called her again that night and the next morning. She and Lizzie went to midnight mass, and took the baby with them, and he never woke up once. Maddy put him in the elegant blue carrying basket she had just bought him, and he looked like a little prince as he lay there in a brand-new blue hat and sweater, beneath an enormous cozy blue blanket with his teddy bear tucked in next to him.

And on Christmas morning, she and Lizzie opened all their gifts for each other. There were bags and gloves and books and sweaters and perfume. But the best gift of all was Andy, as he lay in his basket and looked at them. And when Maddy leaned over and kissed him, he beamed at her. It was a moment she knew she would never forget. A gift she would eternally be grateful for. And as she took him in her arms, she said a silent prayer of thanks to his mother for her incredible gift.

Chapter 24

ON THE DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS, Maddy and Lizzie set out for Vermont in a rented car, and the car looked like a gypsy van with all the equipment for the baby. He slept most of the way and Maddy and Lizzie talked and laughed. They stopped for a hamburger, and while they ate, Maddy gave Andy his bottle. She had never been as happy in her life, or as sure that she had done the right thing. It made her realize now what Jack had taken from her when he had forced her to have her tubes tied. He had taken a great many things from her, her confidence, her self-respect, her self-esteem, her trust, the power to make her own decisions and run her own life. It had been a poor exchange for the job and material things he gave her.

“What are you going to do about the offers you've had?” Lizzie asked with interest on the way to Bill's house in Sugarbush, and Maddy sighed.