Midsummer's Eve

"Yes," he said. "It would have been wrong for you. It was better to make the break while there was time, even if it was at the last moment ... rather than go and make a mistake.”

"But ...”

"Don't worry about it, Annora.”

"Have you ... forgiven me?”

"My dear Annora, there is nothing to forgive really. It seemed right for us then, didn't it? It seemed natural. I think we were carried away by childhood memories.

And that, of course, is not a good reason. It wasn't the past we had to think about but the future. It's over now. Let's forget it.”

Those words were like a tolling bell telling me of the love which was dead.

"After all," he went on, "we're still good friends ... the best of friends.”

How often had those words been spoken, I wondered, to end a broken love affair. "We're good friends ... the best of friends.”

Friends are good to have, but when one has been hoping for more, how sad those words are!

"What about those Cresswells?" he asked. "There was a big scandal about Joseph, wasn't there? It ruined his career.”

"Yes. And then of course there was my uncle.”

"That shady business of his. He seems to have shrugged all that aside.”

"He would. He knows how to make life go the way he wants it to, and when he comes to obstacles he just treats them as though they are not there. He's very interested in Helena's husband and is giving him his support.”

"Oh, yes, Matthew Hume. That was a good book he wrote.”

"He was collecting the material when he was with us in Australia. Matthew and Helena are very happy now. They have another child.”

"You were very fond of the first one.”

"Jonnie is adorable. He did a great deal for me when I was so desolate.”

He nodded. "There seems to be quite a friendship between your family and these Cresswells.”

"Well, Peterkin married Frances. She is the one who opened the Mission, and of course my Uncle Peter gave a lot of money to that.”

"And there was the son.”

"Joe Cresswell, yes.”

"I gather he is a great friend of yours.”

"Yes. He gave up his ambitions to become a Member of Parliament at the time of the scandal. I told him he was wrong to give up. He ought to have been like Uncle Peter.

Just shrug it off. After all, it was not his affair. It was his father who was involved.

I don't see why it should affect him.”

"The sins of the fathers ...”

"Very unfair. However, I'm trying to persuade Joe to make an effort to get into Parliament.

I don't think he will be happy until he >es.”

"You found parliamentary circles interesting?”

"Oh yes, very. I helped Helena and Matthew during the election.”

"It must have been fascinating.”

"It was really ... an entirely new way of life.”

"Yes, of course." He looked at his watch. "You make a very good cup of coffee. I must be going. It has been so pleasant to see you, Annora. I hope you are not going to run away too soon. You must come over to the Manor. I have some curios to show you ... some instruments we have dug up. Bronze Age, I guess. Someone from the Museum is coming to see them.”

"I'd love to look at them, Rolf. And I'd love to see you again.”

He took my hands and held them for a long time.

A few weeks passed. Mr. Tamblin asked me if I was ready to put the cottage up for sale. I said: "Not yet. I should like to stay here in peace for a little while.”

"Sales take a long time to go through," he pointed out.

"I know. But just at the moment I don't want to think about selling.”

I saw Rolf now and then. Knowing how fond I was of riding, he told me to use his stables when I wanted to. I took advantage of the offer and often when I was riding, I met him, and we rode as we used to, galloping our horses along the shore. I looked up and saw the towers of Cador and remembered how I used to stand there, looking out through the battlements at the sea. I was overcome with sadness. There were too many memories here. Sometimes I thought I ought to go back. Rolf was fond of me, but it seemed that he had given up all thought of our marrying. I had deceived myself into thinking that we might come together again. Why is it that one thinks if one repents, everything can go on as before? Of course he would never trust me again.

If we decided to marry how did he know that I should not reject him again?

He invited me to dine at the Manor. Expectantly I went. But there were other guests and although he was the perfect host, it was just a pleasant evening.

He called at the cottage and I gave him coffee. Usually Kitty made it. She delighted in playing the maid and looking after me. I had rarely seen such a change in a girl.

She loved the country; she had her friend Mabel; she was a welcome visitor to the Cador kitchen; her life had changed miraculously. I made up my mind that whatever happened I must keep her with me.

I looked forward to the morning rides. I always hoped that I would meet Rolf. I invariably did, and the thought came to me that he looked for me as I did for him.