Titans of Chaos

I said, "The Dark Mistress is amused by the circus of gladiators, but this is not the place! If youboys can peer through the cloud of manly testosterone you're emitting, note the approach of themaitre d'hotel! Don't do anything that will make them call the police!"

Victor nodded at Quentin, and in a trice, they had Colin hoisted up to their shoulders (lopsidedly,since Victor is taller than Quentin) and were singing, "He's a jolly good fellow! So say all of us!"

The patrons, relieved, smiled and turned back to their meals. One or two even clapped.

The maitre d' approached anyway. "What is the meaning of this?"

I said, "Well... we're British."

He blinked, but the answer seemed to satisfy him. Victor and Quentin staggered out under theirload, who waved and smiled at the other patrons, especially the ladies. Once outside in theparking lot, away from other eyes, the two unceremoniously dumped him to the pavement.

"Ow!" Colin stood and tried to rub both his bum and his head at the same time, which hadcollided loudly with the pavement, also at the same time.

Vanity uttered a moan of disappointment. "There is a Dumpster not five steps away! You couldhave at least tossed him in the trash!"

By that time it was dark, and there was really no point in setting off into the sea at night, ratherthan wait till morning. And a comfortable bed in a hotel with room service and cable televisionwas preferable to sleeping aboard the ship, right? And we did not have to save our money, sincewe were about to travel to some uncharted island, right? So why not rent the penthouse suite?

All were pleased with that decision, but less pleased when I announced, once we were alone in theroom, the girls were taking one room and the boys were bunking in the other. Vanity scowled andwondered aloud when I had gotten so prissy in my old age.

I said sternly, "It is a matter of maintaining unit discipline, troops! Vanity, you will have to doyour snogging with Quentin in the daytime, with no extramarital temptations to put added stresson this group. We were properly brought up little gods and goddesses, all except for Colin, and Isee no reason to descend into lusty barbarism merely because we are in America."

That got me boos and catcalls (one catcall), but there were only two rooms in the suite, and I wasnot going to bunk with Victor and Colin.

Vanity said, "You sound like Boggin. This is out of your jurisdiction, Leader! What we do with ourtime off is not your business."