Way of the Wolf: Straight Line Selling: Master the Art of Persuasion, Influence, and Success

The things a person will internally debate start with a very basic observation: your appearance. They’ll then make a snap decision about you as a result of that. It’s like we discussed in item number one on the syntax. They’ll be debating things like how clean-cut you are, if you’re well dressed or not, how much jewelry you’re wearing. It all goes back to judging a book by its cover. How someone dresses, how long their hair is, how they groom themselves, how they shake hands—it all makes a huge difference in how we’re perceived and, for that matter, how we perceive other people.

For instance, when a man wears a suit and tie, we immediately perceive him as someone who has his shit together: a person of power, so to speak. Same thing goes for a woman, although we’re talking about a power suit in that case. A pantsuit or a skirt is fine, but the skirt should be no higher than just above the knee, and there should be no excessive makeup, jewelry, or perfume. Too much of these things can undermine a woman’s credibility.

Remember, sex sells—for both men and women—but only in a Dolce & Gabbana ad or a Calvin Klein commercial, not in the workplace. If a man or woman wants to be taken seriously, they can’t come to work dressed like they’re going to a nightclub, or coming from the gym. It sends the wrong signal and undermines their credibility. But this whole idea of wrapping your package, as the phrase goes, extends far beyond clothing and perfume. It cuts through to everything.

Let’s start with men’s facial hair.

Anything more than a closely cropped beard or mustache, and you should shave it. It gives off an untrustworthy vibe. It also hints at a lack of pride and a lack of attention to detail. Now, there are a few exceptions to this, of course, like if you’re selling Harley-Davidsons for a living, or if you’re in a part of the world, like the Middle East, where a beard is customary. But, generally speaking, unkempt facial hair is a definite no-no.

The equivalent of an unruly beard for a woman would be an extreme hairdo of some kind. It’s just the sheer excess of it all. It makes you wonder, “What’s wrong with this person?” The same thing goes for excessive jewelry. It’s a major negative, both for a man and for a woman, albeit for entirely different reasons.

Can you guess what’s the worst thing a man can wear, in terms of creating a perception of mistrust?

A pinky ring, especially if it has a big, fat diamond on it. There’s nothing more toxic than a diamond pinky ring when it comes to inspiring mistrust. It gives off the distinct whiff of you being a sharpie—someone who’s on the make. A hustler, but one who’s dressed in an expensive suit . . . and who wears a pinky ring.

That being said, there are certain circumstances where a pinky ring is actually appropriate, such as if you’re the host at a casino, or if you work behind the counter of a jewelry store. It’s called the Law of Congruency, and it fits into the same category as my Harley-Davidson example. In other words, the best way to dress is in a style that’s congruent with your profession.

A plumber, for instance, shouldn’t be wearing a suit and tie when he shows up at your door to give an estimate. Not only would it look ridiculous, but you might also take it as a sign that he’s going to overcharge you because he needs to pay for more suits!

Conversely, if the plumber showed up at your door looking like a total slob, then you’d probably be concerned that his work would be as sloppy as he is. And nobody wants sloppy work done on their plumbing. Based on the Law of Congruency, he should wear a crisp, clean uniform with his company logo on the front and his name embroidered onto the shirt. He should be holding a clipboard, and on it should be a blank estimate form, ready to be filled out.

A male insurance agent should be in a suit and tie. He should wear little if any cologne. If he wears too much, he’ll be perceived as a sharpie. A female insurance agent should be in a power suit, with just enough makeup and jewelry to show that she takes pride in her appearance but isn’t defined by it. And she should be carrying a leather briefcase, but not a Hermès one or one made from crocodile. If she likes perfume, then just a hint.

This is all actually pretty easy to get once you understand the principles behind it. Think back to all of the salespeople you’ve met over the years who violated these rules—all the stockbrokers and insurance brokers and real estate agents and car salesmen . . . doesn’t it amaze you that they were ignoring these easily fixable errors?

The funny thing is, at the time, you couldn’t figure out exactly why you didn’t trust those people, or why you didn’t feel like they had your best interest at heart. But now you know, and it all seems pretty obvious in retrospect. Tools like these help you get into an unconscious rapport very quickly.