Will You Love Me in September

"So severe," he said, kissing the tip of my nose.

"Oh, Lance," I answered, "how I wish you did not feel this urge to gamble. I wish ...”

"You wish I were different.”

"Only in this respect.”

He looked at me pensively and said, "It is a mistake to try to change people, Clarissa.

I learned that long ago. So you have to accept me as I am ... and, my dear Clarissa, please don't let my follies make any difference to that.”

"I expect I have foibles.”

"Adorable ones," he told me.

Then he held me to him and whispered, "One of us came very well out of this sorry business. My own clever Clarissa.”

Tragedy on the Ice

The effects of the South Sea Bubble went rumbling on through that year. There were many sad stories and countless suicides. A subdued air fell over the city. Cynical cartoons appeared. There was one, I remember, with Folly as the charioteer of Fortune which depicted a carriage drawn by foxes with the faces of agents for the company, and the devil was in the sky laughing and blowing soap bubbles.

Nobody talked now of getting rich quickly; instead, it was a matter of speedily reaching the reverse state.

When Lance reckoned up his losses, it was a very depressing time. He decided he would have to sell some of the land in the country merely to keep going. I might offer to help, but I did not want to do this. I think I must have had something of the reformer in me at that time, because I was determined he should learn his lesson.

He must realize the folly of this incessant gambling.

We went down to the country after that. It was a relief to get away from London, but even in the country there were dismal stories of people who were facing ruin.

It was impossible to escape from the disaster of the South Sea Bubble.

I think Lance was a little penitent. It was some time since he had been to the London gaming clubs, and when we arrived in the country, there were none of those gatherings the purpose of which was to play cards as quickly as possible. People were just not in the mood for it-nor now had most of them the means.

Lance had lost a fortune, but he had done so with a certain amount of cheerfulness and quickly began to think of what had happened as the luck of the game. "It could have gone the other way," he said. "Suppose I had sold just before the fall, as I might well have done. Think what I should have now.”

"But you did not," I pointed out in exasperation.

"No. But I might easily have.”

I knew that he had not learned one little lesson from what had happened.

At the end of October a letter arrived from Aimee. This was a real cry for help.

Dear sister, I am writing to you in the hope that, because of the close bond between us, you will lend me a helping hand. I am in desperate straits. My husband has died. It was the shock of the Bubble. We had both invested heavily, with what result you can guess.

We lost almost everything. I shall have to sell up and get what I can for what is left to me. Who would have believed this terrible thing could have happened? Everyone was so sure. It has been the most terrible shock. I know I am not the only one to find myself in such a position, but I shall have to decide what I can do. I could go back to France perhaps, and it may be that this is what I shall have to do. But I am not sure ... particularly as ... It is no use holding back the facts. I am pregnant, Clarissa. We were so looking forward to having a child. Poor Ralph. He thought it was so wonderful ... and now he is dead. It was a heart attack when he heard that we had lost almost everything. I am desperate, because I was persuaded to risk what I had from our father in this miserable South Sea Company.

I don't know what I shall do. I may have to work, though I don't know how, with a baby to care for. But, dear sister, until I can straighten out my affairs, would you be so good-as you once offered-to let me come to you? I promise you I will help in the house. I will try not to be a trouble to you. But do understand I would not ask you if I were not desperate.

If you say yes, I will come to you, say, in three months' time. It will take me that time to settle up here and salvage what I can. If you do say yes, you will make me as happy as it is possible for me to be in these circumstances.

I think I shall be ready to travel in January, and the birth would still be three months ahead, so I should still be able to make the journey. I shall eagerly await your reply, but I shall begin making preparations now, because, knowing you, dear sister, I am sure you will not refuse me in my need.

Your loving sister, Aimee I showed the letter to Lance and he immediately said, "Poor girl. She must be anxious.

Write and tell her at once that she must come to us. She'll be company for you.”

So I dispatched a letter immediately and wondered what difference Aimee's coming would make to our household.