Английский разговорный шутя. 100 анекдотов на все случаи жизни

They all decided to pull practical jokes on their newly married friends. The carpenter decided he would cut the slats in the bed so that when they climbed into bed, the bed would collapse. The ordinary guy decided to short-sheet the bed, so that when they got into it their feet wouldn\'t reach the bottom. The dentist chuckled and wouldn\'t tell anyone what he planned to do.

A week later the three friends all received letters in the mail.

«Dear friends, we didn\'t mind the fact that when we got into bed, the bed collapsed, or the guy that short-sheeted it, but I\'m gonna kill the bastard that put the novacaine in the vaseline!»

Study the words and expressions given below:

groom жених

to commit совершать, устраивать

carpenter плотник

ordinary обычный

guy парень

dentist дантист

slat перекладина

to collapse падать, рушиться

bottom низ

to chuckle хихикать

to mind возражать, иметь что-либо против

bastard ублюдок

novacaine новокаин

vaseline вазелин

to plan on doing sth планировать сделать что-л.

to be prone to doing sth иметь склонность к чему-л.

close friend близкий друг

practical joke розыгрыш

to pull a joke on sb подшутить над кем-л.

newly married молодожены

to short-sheet подвернуть простыню под матрац

Exercises to the text

1. Answer the questions to the text:

1. Why did the couple decide to just go back to their new apartment after the wedding?

2. What were the groom\'s close friends prone to committing?

3. What were they?

4. How did the carpenter decide to make fun of the newly married couple?

5. What did the ordinary guy decide to do?

6. Why didn\'t the dentist say what he was going to do?

7. How long did it take the newly married couple to write letters to their friends?

8. What was the young husband going to do with the dentist?

2. Fill in the blanks with the words from the text:

1. A couple was planning on _______ married.

2. They decided to _______ go back to their new apartment.

3. The groom had three _______ friends.

4. They were prone to _______ practical jokes.

5. They decided to _______ a practical joke on their friends.

6. The carpenter decided he _______ cut the slats.

7. The bed would _______.

8. Their feet didn\'t _______ the bottom.

3. Say if the sentences are true of false:

1. They decided to just go to Italy after the wedding.

2. The groom had three close friends.

3. The carpenter decided he would put the novacaine in the vaseline.

4. The ordinary guy decided to short-sheet the bed.

5. The dentist chuckled and told he would pull the bride\'s teeth out.

6. A week later the three friends all received telegrams.