Girlology: A Girl's Guide to Stuff that Matters

2. Ask their opinions about decisions you need to make. While it’s hard to imagine your mom having her first period, her first kiss and a curfew, we can assure you that she did. Just ask your grandma! Your parents have lived long enough to make many decisions— good and bad—and they can share their real-life experiences with you.

3. Offer reasons of your own for making decisions. This is when your parents will shout for joy, “Well, at least we did something right!” Making well-thought-out decisions is exactly what they have been training you to do. When they see that you have considered the consequences of a choice, they’ll confidently grant you your independence. Yahoo! Mission accomplished!

So What Is Normal?

Let’s review a laundry list of “normal” parent behaviors. They:• Embarrass you • Nose around in your business • Fuss at you about schoolwork, clothes, computer time and your whereabouts • Hate your friends • Love your friends • Establish strict, unbending rules • Establish no rules at all • Give you reasons for the rules • Make decisions for you • Let you choose

Yep, looks like all those abnormal, clueless parents out there are really pretty normal after all. Your normal parents didn’t go anywhere . . . your relationship with them and your perception of them just changed.

Now that we know your parents are possibly and even probably normal, where do you go from here? That’s easy. Keep heading the way your brain and body are leading you—straight toward independence. No matter what your parents’ parenting style is, that brain of yours will get its best exercise by making good decisions. Do whatever it takes to get the best information you can to help you make the best decisions you can . . . and watch your independence grow! Your Girl Power will grow along with it!

PART TWO

Body Talk

4

Not Your Usual Vocabulary List!

Words are powerful. You know because you use them all the time. You use words to get information when you ask your teacher, “Why did Shakespeare make men put on dresses, wigs and high heels to play women’s roles?” You use words to stand up for yourself when you tell a girl in your class, “I’ll help you with the math homework, but I’m not going to let you copy mine.” And you definitely express anger with words when you scream at your sister, “You idiot! I told you not to wash my white sweater with your stupid red sweatshirt!”

When we’re talking about our bodies and sex, using clear, accurate words gives us great power. Sex talk might be a little uncomfortable at first. There are lots of new words, and lots of words you’d only use with girlfriends—lots of words you’d never use with parents or teachers. Don’t worry. In chapters 4 and 5, we’re going to learn clear and accurate words for sex talk. And we’re going to get you some more power!

Pop quiz! Define the following (25 points each): scrotum, clitoris, areola, coitus . . . just kidding. What? Never seen these in your English book? Just as we suspected . . . this will not be your usual vocabulary list!

Awkward Words

It’s no secret that a lot of girls don’t feel comfortable talking about their “private body parts” or things related to sex. It can be embarrassing. It can even be scary. A lot of adults don’t feel comfortable talking about it either. It’s normal to feel uncomfortable and awkward talking about sex and personal subjects. It’s not something we go around talking to everyone about like the weather. But once you do start talking, it gets easier—for teens and for adults.

To help you understand some important things, you will need to know a lot of new terms and words. Some you know; some you don’t know; some you say; some you don’t say. There are also lots of words “out there” that you hear but may not understand. You need to learn about those, too.