Стихотворения

Who is the funny fellow who declines to go to church
Since pope and priest and parson left the poor man in the lurch
And taught their flocks the only way to save all human souls
Was piercing human bodies through with dumdum bulletholes?

                It's Mr Dooley,
                Mr Dooley,
                The mildest man our country ever knew
                'Who will release us
                From Jingo Jesus?'
                 Prays Mr Dooley-ooley-ooley-oo.

Who is the meek philosopher who doesn't care a damn
About the yellow peril or problem of Siam
And disbelieves that British Tar is water from life's fount
And will not gulp the gospel of the German on the Mount?

                It's Mr Dooley,
                Mr Dooley,
                The broadest brain our countiy ever knew
                'The curse of Moses
                On both your houses'
                Cries Mr Dooley-ooley-ooley-oo.

Who is the cheerful imbecile who lights his long chibouk
With pages of the pandect, penal code and Doomsday Book
And wonders why bald justices are bound by law to wear
A toga and a wig made out of someone else's hair?

                It's Mr Dooley,
                Mr Dooley,
                The finest fool our country ever knew
                'They took that toilette
                From Pontius Pilate'
                Thinks Mr Dooley-ooley-ooley-oo.

Who is the man who says he'll go the whole and perfect hog
Before he pays an income tax or licence for a dog
And when he licks a postagestamp regards with smiling scorn
The face of king or emperor or snout of unicorn?

                It's Mr Dooley,
                Mr Dooley,
                The wildest wag our country ever knew
                'O my poor tummy
                His backside gummy!'
                Moans Mr Dooley-ooley-ooley-oo.

Who is the tranquil gentleman who won't salute the State
Or serve Nabuchodonosor or proletariat
But thinks that every son of man has quite enough to do
To paddle down the stream of life his personal canoe?

                It's Mr Dooley,
                Mr Dooley,
                The wisest lad our country ever knew
                'Poor Europe ambles
                Like sheep to shambles!'
                Sighs Mr Dooley-ooley-ooley-oo.

Who is the sunny sceptic who fights shy of Noah's arks
When they are made in Germany by Engels and by Marx
But when the social deluge comes and rain begins to pour
Takes off his coat and trousers and prepares to swim ashore?

                It's Mr Dooley,
                Mr Dooley,
                The bravest boy our country ever knew
                With arms akimbo
                'I'll find that rainbow!'
                Shouts Mr Dooley-ooley-ooley-oo.

ДУЛИСПРУДЕНЦИЯ (на мотив песенки «Мистер Дули»)

Кто этот странный господин? Воюет целый свет,
А он трамвая мирно ждет и едет на обед,
А там, прочтя очередной монарший манифест,
Смеясь, качает головой и дыню долго ест.

                То мистер Дули,
                Мистер Дули,
                Во всей стране он первый вольнодум.
                «Похоже, братцы,
                Что нас надули», —
                Промолвил Дули-дули-дули-дум.