Английский разговорный шутя. 100 анекдотов на все случаи жизни

Study the words and expressions given below:

to avoid избегать

to park парковать (машину)

block квартал домов

to tiptoe от tip (кончик) и toe (палец ноги) идти на цыпочках

to fry жарить

pan кастрюля

frying pan сковорода

hole дыра

sad печальный

inert вялый, зд. неизобретательный

to borrow брать взаймы

bud приятель

Harley мотоцикл «Харлей-Дэвидсон»

screamin\'   разг. screaming вопя, крича

a hootin\' разг. hooting свистя

a hollerin\' разг. howling завывая

rat paзг. right прямо

porch крыльцо

a cussin\' разг. cursing ругаясь

to slam хлопать (дверью); с грохотом открывать (дверь)

amazin\' paзг. amazing удивительный; удивительно

a block away за квартал (от дома)

to get hit получать удар

local watering hole местная забегаловка (досл. местная дыра, где можно промочить горло)

to shake one\'s head качать головой

to get drunk напиваться пьяным

a couple of times пару раз

slam open the door с грохотом открывать дверь

Exercises to the text

1. Answer the questions to the text:

1. When did the guy get home?

2. Why did he park a block away from home?

3. What did he do not to make a noise on the stairs?

4. What did he get hit by?

5. Who did he tell this story the next day?

6. What were they doing in the watering hole?

7. Who does his friend borrow a Harley from?

8. In what way does he drive the Harley?

9. Where does he take the bike?

10. What does he scream when he enteres the door?

11. Why is his wife always asleep?

2. Fill in the blanks with the words from the text:

1. Trying to _______ the little woman, he parks a block away.

2. He takes off his shoes, _______ not to make a noise.

3. He quietly opens the door and _______ into the room.

4. He gets hit by a _______ pan.

5. He tells the story to a friend at the local _______ hole.

6. His best friend _______ shakes his head.

7. I go _______ my bud\'s Harley.

8. I take the Harley rat up on the _______.

3. Say if the statements are true or false:

1. A guy is real drunk and gets home real late.

2. Trying to avoid the little woman, he parks quite near his home.

3. He quietly opens the door and tiptoes into the room.

4. When I get drunk I go borrow my bud\'s F-16 and go screamin\' up and down my block a couple of times.

5. I take the Harley rat up on the porch.

6. I slam open the door and scream, «I\'m the man of the house.»

7. My wife is always away.