Mardock Scramble

She could see the glittering rings on the hand that was waving at her. A shudder tingled down her spine amid her confusion. Synthetic diamonds made from human ashes. The rings that had been entrusted to her to look after during every Show. There were seven of them—the man’s mother and those poor, anonymous girls. She’d heard the rumors that he’d bought a number of girls and let them die. Those rumors were true. And now me too—a wave of nausea welled up inside her. She felt as if something awful had seared itself deep in her chest.

Why? Why me?

The question emerged from her mouth amid the daze. Now the question was no longer about love—it had changed into something more sinister and disturbing. At the same time her nose sensed danger, something burning…a disgusting smell. Sulfurous fumes filled the car, and the alarm in the driver’s seat was beeping, as if to warn of engine trouble.

The man continued smiling and waving for a moment, then quickly turned around and jumped into the other AirCar. Just that moment she remembered some of her fellow whores talking about how gangs liked to burn their victims to death. It made it easier to process the corpses…

She heard a voice: Come on out.

Don’t shut yourself away in the shell of your heart. The words of the volunteer social worker from the Welfare Institute.

The shell. That was what was supposed to have protected her. But right now, she was its prisoner—trapped by a man, the man named Shell-Septinos, the man who had promised to give her back everything that she had lost.

She suddenly became aware that her hand was frantically fumbling at the door handle. For a moment, she didn’t even realize what she was doing. But of course she was trying to save herself.

Deep inside her own heart, another girl, just awakened, looked calmly on at her floundering hands.

Indeed…

The girl murmured. So this was what it was like. To be shut away in a shell. The door wouldn’t open. Her hands kept on struggling with the door handle. She wondered again whether what she had done was really all that bad.

Balot, somebody called. Ironically. The chick was boiled to death in the shell before it was even born. The clients said it was the name of a rare delicacy. The clients who favored doll-like girls. Balot had become the pièce de résistance—no one would tell her not to stay holed away inside her shell again…

Before long the other AirCar started pulling away. As it did, the man in the front passenger seat turned back to her again and waved lightly, carefree. See you soon, he almost seemed to say.

The nausea welled up inside her again. See you soon—once you’re a dead body. Would her scorched remains—her body turned to ashes—really be decorating this gambler’s finger as a synthetic jewel?

Her chest clenched in dread thinking about this. The body that had survived so far by meeting the needs of others: Was this to be its fate? Was she to be used as a thing right until the end?

“Die, you bastard. Die.”

She was shouting now, as if by reflex. She clung to the window, tried to watch the AirCar as it sped away, but soon lost sight of it and was left only with her own translucent reflection.

“You’re a shit. You’re nothing but shit. I hope you die, you shit!”

And now she was directing an angry tirade at the man somewhere beyond the window: foolish, trash. As if she were singing. Then she inhaled, choked on the acrid air. Tears welled up. Her head went hazy. Her hands were yanking at the door as if her life depended on it. A lingering memory of the man was still burning deep inside her body.

Foolish, trash, ash, cash.

The little ditty spun around in her head. That’s all I am. Was there a version of myself who thought that? she wondered for an instant and looked out, but only a sad reflection stared back at her. Even now her hands continued to grapple with the door handle.

Josh, fish, gash, hash.

A wave of despair assaulted her, and the part of her that had up to that point remained hidden behind the thin layer of skin suddenly emerged.

“No! Help me, please!”

At that moment the pressure inside the car suddenly dropped, and a high-pitched buzz sounded. Something, somewhere, caught fire.

Flash.

The pain lasted only an instant. A terrible roar and an explosion assaulted her, and her vision was flooded with a blinding white light.

“I don’t want to die.”

That was the last sound the girl was ever to voice.

In the next instant the driver’s seat was blown backwards by the force of the blast, slamming her body against the rear seat before the raging flames flared up and everything became a single mass of fire.

≡

“Are you in pain, Mr. Shell?” the man in the driver’s seat asked of the man now sprawled in the front passenger seat.